Euphemism for...

In all the hoopla about LeBron James changing basketball teams a couple of weeks ago, nobody has bought into the real gem he gave us. His announcement that he's going to play for Miami was worded thusly: "I'm taking my talents to South Beach." This is a great new euphemism for taking a dump. Here are my favorite ways to tell people you're going to take a dump:

Taking the Browns to the Super Bowl
I've decided to take my talents to South Beach
Do some paperwork
Downloading some brownware
Hitting a double
Making a deposit at the porcelain bank
Squeezing off a few rounds
Stocking the pond with brown trout
Taking a load off my mind
Contaminating the dog dish
Dropping the kids off at the pool
Making a log entry
Exporting a cigar to Cuba
Negotiating the release of the chocolate hostages
Releasing my payload


You're welcome.

I was going to read this, but I have to go take a shit.
Hey, ya gotta tell it like it is!

Why do you say, 'take a shit' when what you actually do is leave one. If you took one, what would you do with it afterwards?

Just my cultural contribution for the day.